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The 20 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week (June 6-12)

Published: (Updated: ) in Australian News by .

The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious musings of 280 characters or less.

Scroll through this week’s great tweets from women below. Then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.

“He looked like if a warm can of sprite was a person” —a late night writer trying to describe the perpetrator to a police sketch artist

— Sarah Cooper (@sarahcpr) June 10, 2020

oh my god. have not introduced myself to anyone in so long that when the USPS automated voice said to record my name for a call back i panicked and said “karen tree” what the fuck

— Karen Chee (@karencheee) June 12, 2020

how tf a computer gone ask me if i’m a robot 😭 bitch you da robot 😭😭

— ya personal slut (@liddlexie) June 10, 2020

welp, there’s nobody left in my family I can talk to without crying, but at least I have you, can of tomato paste.

— Morgan Murphy (@morgan_murphy) June 9, 2020

I don’t just learn history from statues, I learn EVERYTHING from statues. BIOLOGY: greek gods have peepees sometimes. ANATOMY: girls dont have arms. RELIGION: jesus was big as brazil, VERY scary

— Megan Amram (@meganamram) June 12, 2020

Somebody said they accidentally screamed “Jesus” at a protest when they said “say his name” 😂

— Saint Rems🌻 (@RemiOmolosho) June 10, 2020

Why did I have to learn what a rhombus is? literally nothing is rhombus shaped.

— Reeezy (@MsReeezy) June 10, 2020

Wow seems like lots of people upset about the new PlayStation could use some “consoling” !

— Bec Shaw (@Brocklesnitch) June 12, 2020

Quarantine has taught me a lot about myself. For example, I would marry someone just because they were good at making peach cobbler.

— Ashley Nicole Black (@ashleyn1cole) June 12, 2020

if making my therapist laugh counts, yes i am still “active in the NYC comedy scene”

— jourdain (@jourdayen) June 10, 2020

me smiling at people under my mask thinking that they can see it pic.twitter.com/XSebFYSuT8

— katelyn (@noitskatelyn) June 6, 2020

accidentally vacuumed up my air guitar again.

— kim. (@KimmyMonte) June 10, 2020

I will NEVER forgive y’all for the way y’all acted at the grocery stores those first 3 weeks of quarantine

— stevie wonder pls call me🦋 (@lilliexnicole) June 9, 2020

Time to call my antifa aarp super soldier on the phone or as I like to call him dad

— Molly Jong-Fast🏡 (@MollyJongFast) June 10, 2020

White people have no problem pronouncing Daenerys Targaryen but start stuttering when tryna pronounce Ahmed

— amna (@amnaaxs) June 8, 2020

absolutely wild that elmo has had a dad this whole time, and that dad allowed elmo to spend the last 40 years running around new york city basically unsupervised.

— Erin 🕳🏃🏻‍♀️Ryan (@morninggloria) June 6, 2020

all my love and adoration to the woman in my zoom pilates class last week who thought she was muted so she just let her butthole give‘er for the full hour.

— Scaachi (@Scaachi) June 8, 2020

During quarantine, not getting a text back from someone is a downright act of war

— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) June 11, 2020

Every guy you hook up with can either end up in marriage or him watching your snapchat story until the day you die and I think that’s beautiful ❤️

— Abby Govindan (@abbygov) June 9, 2020

DENTIST WHO CAN ONLY SEE THE WORLD THROUGH THE LENS OF DENTISTRY: The brain, huh? Sounds like a kind of mouth that chews up thoughts.

— Avery Edison (@aedison) June 12, 2020

The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant and succinct wit. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious musings of 280 characters or less.

Scroll through this week’s great tweets from women below. Then visit our “Funniest Tweets From Women” page for past roundups.

Source: Huffington Post Australia Athena2 https://www.huffingtonpost.com.au/entry/funniest-tweets-from-women-this-week_au_5ee93d6bc5b695286b7879a6

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